Welcome

Good Morning!

Ok, so I would like to begin by telling all of you what a computer illiterate fool the author is. I only say this because I used to stare at these things wondering how in the world these seemingly normal people could have access to the internet to do the two things I really enjoy doing (no, don't worry I do THAT somewhere else on the internet) : 1) Offering my opinion and 2)......well okay the one thing I really enjoy doing.

Then something occured to me: If 14 year old fans of Ashley Simpson and overly-opinionated fascists could figure out how to do the blog, I could too.."After all," I said to myself, " I am overly opinionated! I have been 14! and damnit, I love..like...okay well, I have heard of Ashley Simpson!"

So I started my research, I started asking questions: "What sort of web log defines me as a person?", "what is it that the people want, because afterall you have to give the people what they want!" and "I wonder if anyone is going to finish that Low Fat Caramel Apple Scone on that table?". When I got the report back from my research department, I was astounded at the amount of feedback I got in regard to what "the people" wanted from me. It turns out that the people, much like myself, want honesty, integrity, and a sincere regard for the thoughts and dreams of the average member of the Community of Nations.

So then I thought to myself: " Lacking all those things, what could I bring to the World Wide Web and all of its fans, most of whom are obviously possessed of a surplus of disposable time?"
Then the answer hit me like the High School girl at the adjacent table when I tried to finish her Law Fat Caramel Apple Scone: ....wait no colon yet, this is the "big reveal" as they say in writing, so instead of just a colon, I am going with the Colon-New-Paragraph combo for added effect. So let me try that again....
Then the answer hit me like the High School girl at the adjacent table when I tried to finish her Law Fat Caramel Apple Scone:

"Give the people a part of yourself!" a voice said to me.

It turns out the voice was the retired Superior Court bailiff sitting behind me in the Starbucks, reading this over my shoulder. But if there is one thing I have learned in my blog-writing career it is that inspiration is a fickle and sneaky little Muse, so ...thanks Rusty!

Now for those of you who know me, you also know that offering a piece of myself in an honest revelation, does not always come easy for me, so this blog will offer us an opportunity to grow together, you and I.

Now I know what you are thinking.."Vincent, what is my part in this revolution?" Well, good question, and here it is: If you are reading this, it means you got the email about it. That means that I invited you because I value what you think, or at the very least somehow ended up with your email address. So your new job is to sheperd my self-esteem to a pasture of ego and artificial confidence by constantly telling me how clever I am after you read these. At least that is my understanding of the role of the blog reader, and blog reader my friend, is what you now are!!!

The other purpose you now serve is as my Reseach and Development team. You can offer up ideas that I can pass off as my own, and serve as my brain and soul.

Congratulations, and welcome to the World Wide Web!

vincent
The Arch-Groovus